1. Don't have to worry about getting cancer anymore: "No, thanks-I already have mine."

2. Trips to the barber become something to look forward to in the future.

3. All the drugs you ever wanted and more.

4. Everybody wants to help you.

5. Paying off the home loan becomes a just a meaningless exercise.

6. Handicapped parking!

7. "Not interested- I've got cancer" becomes the fastest telemarketer blow-off ever.

8. You get to find out what life is REALLY all about.

9. You get to know your local hospital really REALLY well.

10. You don't have to worry about giving it to anybody.